The fear factor

The reality check ladies is that labour and giving birth looks worse when it’s somebody else’s! Agreed, at the time you feel as though you are going to die, but squirming, rocking, walking, cursing, blaming your partner – ‘this is all your fault!’ – does help you to get through contractions. The good news too is that there are breaks between contractions when you have no pain and briefly feel human.  During these breathers you get the chance to regain some of your dignity and prepare for the next contraction.

Over the years I’ve learned to use the power of my mind to deal with pain and difficult situations, to trust my instincts, ask for help when I need it and leave the rest to my body. Giving birth, feeding babies and nurturing family is what we’re hard-wired to do ladies. Somehow, no matter the circumstances - we manage!  

Remember too that (providing we’re healthy) the body is self-healing. Our invincible hormonal system tirelessly readjusts and rebalances major systems, with instructions to either fight or flee. Not only are our hormones an invisible behind-the-scenes back-up and support system, they’re also there to do the ‘mopping-up’. 

Like prostaglandins. These hormones play their part in ovulation, menstruation and labour – helping the womb to contract and relax. They’re made by a chemical reaction where and when they’re needed. Prostaglandins also deal with injury then disappear when their task is done. 

Prostaglandins are balanced by endorphins. These ‘morphine-like’ hormones bring pain relief – even euphoria. As birth approaches your body also releases adrenaline and noradrenaline. These opposing hormones give you a surge of energy during strong expulsive contractions. The combination of these hormones will help you birth your baby and get you through the next few days after the birth when you have to deal with after-birth pain and discomforts. 

Another hormone called relaxin may be giving you a hard time now. This hormone softens and relaxes pelvic joints making it easier for baby to negotiate the birth passage. In the final stages of pregnancy relaxin can make your pelvis slightly unstable, resulting in a waddle-walk and backache. Exercise with supervision. This is one time when ‘no pain no gain’ does not apply!

Enjoying the last phase of your pregnancy

• Lemon water, fresh ginger tea, cream crackers and grated apple help with ‘morning’ sickness – it sometimes comes back at the end of your pregnancy

• Exercise every day: walk, swim, dance to your favourite music

• Don’t cut your hair really short – it makes your face look fatter

• Buy only one or two smart maternity outfits and lose-fitting tops

• Speak to women with babies. Ask them about the clinic, immunisations, baby-sitters and day care

• Make special time for you and your partner – there won’t be much of it once baby gets here! 

• Try drinking a cup of warmed milk before you go to sleep

• Heartburn can return with a vengeance towards the end of your pregnancy. Stick to small, bland but nutritious meals

• Pregnancy is not an excuse to binge eat. Losing the extra weight can take a life-time!

• From 8 months onwards, be prepared for labour – suitcase packed, legs waxed, toenails painted, lists made, food in the cupboards

• Breathe through ‘Braxton-Hicks’ contractions and use these to practice for labour

• Teach yourself relaxation techniques. Use your imagination to visualise a ‘happy place’ when you’re stressed or can’t sleep

• Communicate with your partner – he has no idea how you’re feeling or what’s going on in your head!

• Speak to your doctor about recommended methods of pain relief when you’re in labour

• Forget about ‘birth plans’ – everything goes out the window when you’re in pain!

How your breasts change during your pregnancy...

October has been coloured pink for Breast Cancer Awareness. Tree-trunks wrapped in pink cloth, walkathons and marathons, and ‘Pink Tea Parties’ to raise funds for breast cancer awareness. Staff (men included) are wearing pink to work. I’m sporting a pink ribbon. Magazines are carrying heart-warming stories about breast cancer survivors. Education and awareness is key. But besides encouraging women to give themselves regular breast examinations and to go for mammograms, getting to the heart of where cancer is coming from, is perhaps more important. 

Breasts and periods:

The link between breasts and periods is by way of a hormone called oestrogen. Oestrogen is an essential ingredient of our femininity. 

•  Oestrogen boosts our mood and makes us feel sexy

•  It keeps skin plump and moist (delaying wrinkles) 

•  Retains natural hair colour and buoyancy (noticed how hair sometimes becomes curly after puberty?) and shine!

•  Oestrogen gives us energy, it helps us get things done! 

During the first half of every menstrual cycle, oestrogen is made in the ovary by the ova (eggs) in preparation for ovulation (the release of the egg) and consequent fertilisation. 

Ovulation happens about mid-cycle (a cycle is calculated from the first day of one period to the first day of the next period). Besides preparing the womb and cervix (mouth of the womb) for fertilisation, oestrogen prepares certain ‘target cells’ in the breast for breastfeeding – namely the breast ducts.

As helpful as oestrogen is, it has some drawbacks. Because this hormone stimulates cells to multiply it is called carcinogenic – in other words, ‘cancer-causing’. Luckily the oestrogen-ovulation-peak only lasts about 5 days of the menstrual cycle, and oestrogen effects are balanced by another hormone, progesterone, that’s produced after ovulation. This ‘balancing act’ only occurs with natural menstrual cycles (i.e. not ‘pill’ cycles). 

During pregnancy, oestrogen and progesterone are made by the placenta (not the ovaries) and their task is to maintain the pregnancy and prepare the woman’s body for the birth, and breastfeeding. By the sixth month, breast ducts (channels) and alveoli (these look like bunches of grapes where the milk is made) are fully developed, and this is where colostrum comes from. 

This also means that by this stage of your pregnancy, your breasts have nearly reached the final stages of development (this is completed with breastfeeding – ideally for a year). After weaning, when your menstrual cycles return to normal, breast tissue will no longer be ‘oestrogen sensitive’ because they’re fully matured – thus sparing them the carcinogenic effects of oestrogen.

In this way, pregnancy and breastfeeding helps to protect a women’s breasts from cancer.

Please note that there are many types of breast cancer – pregnancy and breastfeeding is not a guarantee that you will not get breast cancer. It is only one of the many protective mechanisms. 

Your unborn baby, week 1 - 36

Let’s recap what’s happened since you had your last period:

Week 1: Conception, journey through fallopian tube – day 6, implantation into the womb begins

Week 2: Day 10 implantation completed, 3 layers of cells develop including placental cells

Week 3: Period missed – Embryo with neural tube (brain and spinal cord) heart and thyroid cells

Week 4: Heart begins to beat! Size 4 mm. Shape embryonic with arm buds 

Week 5: Primitive eyes and mouth, hand plates and leg buds. Size doubled to 8 mm

Week 6: Nose and mouth cavities with upper lip, foot plates; arms bend at elbows with finger rays

Week 7: Eyelids beginning, genitals unisex, beginning to look human, size 18 mm

Week 8: Fingers distinct, genital testicles or ovaries distinguishable, size 30 mm

Week 9: Now called foetus, looks like a baby, genitals becoming boy or girl, size 50 mm

Week 10: Face looks human, genitals developing, size 61 mm

Week 11: Toes beginning to take shape weighs 10 – 15 grams 

Week 12: The gelatinous body is becoming firmer with cartilage

Week 13: Jerky movement seen on the ultrasound scan. Testicles producing testosterone, ovaries contain millions of immature eggs

Week 17: Mother feels kicks. Eyes closed, body covered with lanugo – fine hair, size 18 cms wt. 90 – 120 grams

Week 20: Pregnancy shows, baby size 18 – 20 cms. Sucking and swallowing reflexes, baby can taste and hear

Week 23: Baby has 44% chance of survival if born prematurely

Week 24: Called a baby weighs 500 grams approx. 30 cms. Baby has 63% chance of survival

Week 26: Eyes open and blink. Rapid brain development. Approx. 32cm long and weighs 800 – 925 grams. Baby has 81% chance of survival if born prematurely.

Week 36: Baby in the head-down ‘birthing position’. Baby can weigh up to 2 kgs. Approx. 34cm long. Labour can begin from 38 – 42 weeks gestation.

Porridge Brain Syndrome

Don’t worry – PBS is normal and happens to the best of us. This part of pregnancy numbs a woman’s brains in preparation for what’s going to happen over the next 21 years – disturbed sleep, financial crises, sick children, school hang-ups (all over again) and everything else that comes with parenthood. And don’t expect sympathy from your parents. They’re delighted that you’re pregnant because soon they’ll be getting their own back. After all, grand parenting is the reward for not killing their own in the first place!

When you have PBS, important data from your brain gets fed to the placenta – which of course comes away after the birth – so it’s lost forever! A bit like a computer crash. Worse, there’s no trash bin to recover information from. And of course, the more children you have, the more data you lose.

Women with PBS also become self-absorbed and self-centred. They’re not interested in the news, what’s happening in their neighbourhood or the stock market. She only thinks about herself and her next ante-natal appointment, baby magazines, pregnancy web sites, baby-showers and shopping-lists for baby goodies.

Apart from acknowledging that this is happening, and learning to deal with it, there’s no treatment for PBS. It’s an important mothering skill that teaches you the benefits of ‘quiet time’ – alone. Doing this while you are pregnant helps you to connect emotionally and spiritually with your baby. Withdrawing yourself from society after the birth allows you to spend quiet, one-on-one bonding time with your baby. Mothers never quite cut the umbilical cord. We grow and ‘become’ with our children, learning more about ourselves while we learn about them. It’s a privilege we should never take for granted.

Porridge brain and all, these ARE the magical moments of motherhood! Cherish them … and learn not to fret the small stuff.