When a cut needs to be stitched

When should you take your child for stitches?

For children, the scars of bumps and bruises, cuts and broken bones are learning trophies. While parents do their best to keep the home and yard as safe as possible, it’s impossible to protect your child all the time. Accidents happen!

When your child comes dripping blood into the house, or the children playing in the communal playground begin to wail like sirens that somebody’s hurt, parents are the first to rush to the scene of the accident. Fear and anxiety can do funny things. Some people shout, some panic and do more harm than good, others just faint!

It helps when you know what to do.

Be calm and assess the situation. Talk gently to the child and ask questions to find out exactly what happened. More often than not the wound is superficial – but a little bit of blood can make children panic.

If the cut is small and hardly bleeding, wash it thoroughly under the tap to remove superficial dirt. Air-dry before putting on the plaster (otherwise it won’t stick) to keep the wound clean for a day or two while it heals. Take off the plaster once the wound has healed, and keep it clean and dry with a dab of Mercurochrome.

Small cuts will bleed profusely if they include an artery. This can be over the wrist, the neck and in the groin. Then bright-red blood will spurt out like a hosepipe attached to a pump. Children can lose a lot of blood very quickly, and this can make them go into shock. It’s important to lie the child down and to raise the body part that’s bleeding above the level of the heart. Any clean cloth can be used to cover the open wound so that steady pressure can be applied. This gives the blood a chance to clot around the wound and help stop the bleeding. If the blood soaks through the cloth, apply another one over this while continuing to apply pressure. Call the ambulance or take the child to hospital with a pressure bandage and an adult supporting the child.

A gaping cut will need to be stitched to stop the bleeding, speed-up the healing process  and minimise scarring. In the ER three types of stitching can be used:

Steri-strips – these are special plaster strips that join the two surfaces of the cut without a needle and thread.

Dissolving stitches – these don’t need to be removed but are best used where they will be undisturbed e.g. on the forehead or limbs.

Removable stitches are used on bigger cuts, especially where there is a lot of body movement e.g. the face, elbows, knees and other joints. These are usually taken out a week after the incident.

When your child has stitches, keep the wound clean and covered according to instructions from the doctor. When the stitches have dissolved / been removed, keep the wound clean and dry with a dab of Mercurochrome. If your child picks at the scab, it will become infected, take longer to heal and leave a nasty scar. If necessary, use a gauze dressing to prevent this. 

Illustration from Dr Miriam Stoppard’s book “Baby and Child Health Care” (an authoritative easy-reference A-Z guide to children’s illnesses, their symptoms and treatment) – highly recommended for every home.

Tips for teenagers and parents at exam time

Writing exams

It’s exam time again. If you have teens at home, you’ll find that this time of the year they’re moody, grumpy, non-communicable and emptying the fridge contents into their stomachs. Teens get angry when you remind them they should be studying (instead of watching TV), spend the night cram-studying and then can’t understand why they can’t think straight the next morning!

Why is it that pre-schoolers are ultra-curious about the world they’re living in, yet by the time they get to matric, most of them hate learning? I think there is something seriously wrong with the school education system. Teens should leave school wanting to learn, because after all, learning is what life is all about.

How parents can help their teenagers:

ü  Encourage and motivate them without being pushy

ü  Don’t make your teenager feel like a failure even before they’ve started writing exams

ü  Remind them to make the most of the work they’ve done during the year, and not to abandon the notes they’ve already made

ü  Remind them that they have youth on their side – it’s easier for teenagers to learn than it is for adults

ü  Let them make the most of studying opportunities provided by the school / study notes / revision programmes on TV

ü  Persuade them (if possible) to switch off their cell phones while they’re studying. Friends can be distracting

ü  To boost their energy levels, make sure they’re eating properly. A short course of multi-vitamins can help

http://vitamins.lovetoknow.com/What_is_a_Good_Vitamin_for_My_Teenager_to_Take

ü  Secure a quiet space for them to study and give them a break from regular chores around the house

ü  Offer them a reward/treat (irrespective of the results) when exams are over!

How teenagers can help themselves:

ü Learn to manage your time according to the exam time-table. Prioritise which subjects need the most attention

ü Get into the rhythm of a daily routine

ü Mind-map revision notes – these are easier to memorise

ü Study guides give you practical advice on how to answer papers. They also provide practice-questions with answers at the back. If your answer was wrong, work out why it was so that you don’t make the same mistake in the exam!

ü Practice, practice, practice

ü Read questions carefully – understand what’s being asked before launching into an answer

ü Take regular breaks while you are studying – work for two hours with a fifteen-minute break in between, and a half-hour break after studying for two hours

ü During your break do things you enjoy without sitting around – dance, play sport, listening to music, take a walk around your neighbourhood

ü Leave your study notes on the morning of your exam! Nerves and anxiety will only stress you more and confuse your brain

ü When you get to school, don’t discuss the exam with the other kids in your class – they will only make you nervous. It’s better to spend this time quietly and on your own. 

Good Luck!

What does it mean to be a parent?

What is parenthood?

• “Parenthood is a very important period for consolidating identity and for expanding maturity” – Jean MacFarlane
• “Parenthood brings out the better side of people” – the Foundation for Child Development
• “If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called labour” – Scott M Peck
• “The amount of richness that children can bring into the lives of their parents is indescribable” – John Clever
• “The most forceful motivation of active fatherhood has been the voice of feminism” – Robert Coleman
• “Good parenting is not done by formula” – Jerome Kagen
• “Surrendering to motherhood means surrendering to interruption” – Erica Jong
• “A mother’s interaction with her children – enveloping, secure, modulated and controlled. More cooing and playing verbal games. Father is playful, exciting, physical” – Vance Packard
• “We had a mother to answer to. We loved her profoundly, and our driving force was to do what she wanted because we knew how much it meant to her” – James Cogney
• “Fathers who are more available to their children than average, who are nurturers, accepting and serve as active teachers, tend to have children who excel in school” – Vance Packard

Artwork by Colette Edmonds: from my handbook "Childbirth Education is Fun!"

“Remember that through your parents you were born

And what can you give back to them that equals their gift to you?”

Sirach 7:28

Top tips for a healthy pregnancy

Ten top tips for a healthy pregnancy

The first 1,000 days (from conception to the age of two) are the most important in your baby’s life. Here’s how you can prepare for them.

1.    Get healthy before you get pregnant. Make sure you’re the right weight for height, your blood sugars and blood pressure are stable and you’re exercising regularly. Ditch bad habits like smoking and drinking.

2.    Once you’re pregnant, don’t miss clinic/ gynaecologist/midwife appointments. There will be about 12 over the next 8 months.

3.    First trimester: Expect to feel exhausted with nausea and emotional outbursts. These symptoms will settle by your third month, so don’t stress too much about them.

4.    What you should tell your doctor/midwife:

Tell your health-care provider about vaginal bleeding – especially if it comes with pain and/or a fever. Report headaches, blurring or problems with your eyes, burning when passing urine and vaginal discharges.

5.    Diet and supplements: You’ll need extra minerals and vitamins when you’re pregnant. There are special pregnancy supplements for these. You’ll also burn extra calories and will need extra protein – especially in the last few months of your pregnancy when your baby’s brain is developing. You don’t need to eat for two – just make sure that you’re eating healthy!

6.    Avoiding and treating infections: Pregnant women have a lower resistance to infections and many viruses are small enough to cross the protective placental barrier. It’s wise to avoid people-busy places during the first 12 weeks when your baby’s organs are developing. Some antibiotics are not good to take during pregnancy. It’s best to boost your immune system with fresh fruit (e.g. oranges, strawberries and guavas).

7.    Look after your breasts. By six months your breasts may start leaking colostrum – your baby’s first milk. Make sure you’re wearing a comfortable, well-fitting bra. You don’t need to ‘toughen-up’ the nipple for breastfeeding. Nipple trauma is avoided when your baby latches onto your nipple correctly.

8.    Staying active: Join ante-natal exercises or simply walk or swim every day. Exercise gets your blood circulating and helps with aches and pains – especially backache.

9.    Working while you wait: Most women work for as long as possible. Some professions like flying, hair-dressing, nursing and lab technicians may have to adapt their working circumstances for the safety of their unborn babies.

10. Be aware of your baby’s movements:

If this is your first pregnancy, you will feel your baby move for the first time at around five months. Second time round, baby’s movements will be felt much earlier. The first flutters of ‘life’ helps you to bond with your baby. In the last two months of pregnancy you may notice a pattern in your baby’s movements.  How your baby moves will give you an idea of your baby’s personality! If you don’t feel your baby move for more than four hours, do something to wake him/her – like eating or taking a shower. If your baby still doesn’t move, phone your doctor.  

Nine months of pregnancy is more than enough time to get used to the idea of becoming a parent. Every child, whether planned or not, is a precious gift. Treasure your pregnancy and use this special time to prepare for and give your child the best possible start in life.

Life with teenagers

Dealing with teenagers

I enjoy reading the Pajama Diaries in our daily newspaper. They remind us to look on the funny side of life with teenagers.

And, teenagers aren’t always the easiest people to get on with. Called ‘hormonal tinderboxes’, they have emotional highs and lows with outbursts of rage and apathy, so you’re never quite sure where you stand with them. You also have to treat them with kit-gloves when they’re feeling self-conscious, insecure and withdrawn. Teenagers can come across as aggressive, rebellious under-achievers, but under that hard exterior, they’re as soft as putty!

The best way to deal with a teenager is to understand their needs.

Growth spurts:

Teenagers are growing at an alarming rate and using up extra energy doing sports and schoolwork. This is mostly because they’re producing more serotonin than usual. In my experience, teenage boys are always hungry, and they’re grumpy and unreasonable when they are. Girls on the other hand, are figure conscious but can’t help binging when they have period cravings. I suggest you stock up the grocery cupboards and fridge with carbohydrates and protein-rich foods rather than sugars and fats.

Interest in sex:

During puberty, the ovaries and testicles pour oestrogen and testosterone into the bloodstream. This not only initiates and maintains body changes – mostly to their reproductive systems – these hormones also send messages to the pituitary gland in the brain that in turn, sends a series of reproductive hormones back the gonads (ovaries and testicles) telling them what to do.

Naturally, this gives them an appetite for the opposite sex. Don’t leave telling your teenager about the do’s and the don’t when it comes to sex to the school sex-ed. classes, the church youth-group, magazines or the internet. Answer their questions honestly. They’re seriously not interested in your sex life – they only want to know what’s happening to them.

Image:

Today, it’s all about image and money, money, money – which parents don’t always have. You may not be able to buy your teen the trendiest clothes or popular brand labels, but you can teach them that it’s not what you wear, but how you wear it that counts.

Self-confidence begins with grooming – something that boys don’t think much about and girls take very seriously. You will have to dig deeper into your pocket when it comes to essential toiletries. Girls need sanitary pads and tampons, hair-removal kits, manicure sets, quality shampoo and hair conditioners. Boys need shaving gear and deodorant – even when they tell you they don’t. Teenagers soon learn that when you feel good, you look good – and visa-versa!

Friends:

Parents often feel snubbed when teenagers prefer spending time with their friends rather than with family. It’s an independence struggle and parents have to learn to let go – while keeping a ‘third eye’ on who their friends are, where they’re going and what they’re up to. Boys will come home when they’re hungry and a bonus is that when the food is good at home, they’ll bring their friends. Girls may object on the surface when (especially their fathers) insist on meeting their latest boyfriend and interrogating his intent before going on a date – but secretly this makes her secure because it shows that her parents care!

Boosting your teenager’s confidence:

• Giving your teenager responsibilities around the house and for the family may bring on objections, but it will make your teenager feel an important part of the family (especially when these come with financial rewards).
• Love your teenager unconditionally, but never show this affection in public!
• Show an interest in what’s happening in your teenagers’ life without interfering.
• Get your teenager involved when deciding the family rules.
• As difficult as it is to let go, it’s only fair to allow your teenager to become independent. S/he will behave responsibly when you say “I know you will do the right thing”!

How to do this:

Make time for family meals. Sit around the table together, switch off the TV and TALK!

Stick to routine

Teenagers diurnal rhythm changes and they prefer going to bed much later – but keep bed time consistent and week nights for homework and school projects

Make their friends feel welcome

Learn to walk away when the situation looks like it’s getting out of control. Somebody has to be the adult – and that’s inevitably you!